Fate, God and My Friend Jeff

It's been quite some time since I've updated this. Partly due to the fact that we have more going on than I would like most of the time, mostly due to the fact that I'm lazy but also because I knew what I wanted to talk about in this thread but not really how to go about it. It could be a sensitive subject for some and I really don't want to offend certain people if they should happen to come by here. I need to write it out though if only to work through my own thoughts on these issues.

When last I wrote, I told of a friend of mine that I had recently reconnected with that was going through treatment for brain cancer. I got to see my friend for the first time in 9 years in April. It was nice to see him and his family again. Unfortunately, the cancer spread his spine soon afterward. He passed away in August.
Jeff was a good man. My life was better from having known him. He was the kind of friend I wish I could be to those that would call me a friend.

My wife and I attended his memorial service. It was a little surprising to me to find that Jeff had become very active in his church. Don't get me wrong, he wasn't a wild man in college or anything. I just never really saw any indication that he was a deeply religious man. (This came about before the cancer for those cynical people that may be reading.) Was this something that came after I knew him or was it always there as a personal belief? His family was also active in the church and his wife was dealing with her loss much better than I would be able to in her place. She credited her faith as a large reason for this.

I think of myself as a spiritual person, I do believe in a creator and an afterlife, but I have a hard time believing in many things churches teach. I would never think less of anyone that is a church goer though. If it helps somebody feel more complete in their life and isn't hurting anyone else I'm all for it. I don't like to be preached to, but I do very much like to discuss these types of things with people. Not because I like to argue, which I do, but because I think it's always good to keep an open mind on almost anything. The day you think you can't learn something new is the day you stop really living.

Something that was said in the service got me thinking of God and fate though. You often hear people talk about God's plan. Especially when a loved one has passed. Some people take solace in these sentiments. While I can see that it might give some comfort to those that have just lost a loved one, there are those that fully believe those sentiments with every fiber of their being. This I don't understand and it gets to the heart of one of my bigger issues with organized religion.

To believe that it was God's will that your loved one be taken is to believe that we have no say in anything that happens in our lives. There is no free will with this line of thinking. Consider somebody that is murdered. If it is God's will that a person died at this time, then it would also be by God's will that the murderer carried out this act. Churches often talk of sin and it's punishment, but how can there be sin if everything is God's will that has been fated to happen? I believe God created man (and not necessarily as told in the bible, but that's a different issue altogether) but gave him free will. Your life and it's path are the result of two things: choice and luck.

Then again, I wonder, was it just coincidence that made me finally reconnect with my friend Jeff just before he passed?